Why do you drive me crazy.
I’ve never been one to have someone drive me crazy. And so this is a pretty weird feeling to have. I recently met this person and we kicked off and had a great time and I thought everything was going good. But then all of sudden things change and words are being said less and then out of the blue nothing is being said.
So, now I’m trying to think what was the root cause of this issue and why did it happen? And what did I do wrong? The more that I think about what happened it drives me crazy. It consumes my mind and all I can do is think about it and think why would someone do this to me. Why aren’t people upfront with what they want. What’s the intention behind playing someone emotions and more importantly someone whose willing to go above and beyond to make sure that everything is okay with you. These thoughts haunt me and made me question myself and how I deal with people.
I’d say that I get fairly invested in people once I’ve understood who you are. It’s tough when I’m fully invested in someone and giving them my all and willing to do literally anything for them but in return they do nothing for me and ignore me. This makes me feel bad but also makes me feel like I’m just there punching bag or there second option. In the same respect it really put things in perspective that there are people who strictly use you for your kindness and they know that you are someone where it’s hard to leave someone whose using you. The more that I think about it the more that it makes me think am i being used. Was everything I did in vain? Was it your way of showing that all I’m going to be is someone that you use for convenience because of how reliable I am.
There is this song off Sango album Da Rochina 2 called Maluco that I recently found and have been listening to it every morning for the past two weeks. In this song Sango samples Immature “ I Don’t Mind” and throughout the song he continues to repeat the line “Don’t you know you drive me crazy” and for some reason when I heard this line it really resonated with me because at that moment I was in this place of being driven crazy. I was stressed and lost and felt like I was going crazy for this one person just because they weren’t able to tell me what there true thoughts are. And all I wanted was closure and wanted to know where we stood. I also wanted them to know that I’ve been thinking about them and how important they are. But sadly, it looks like that wasn’t going to be the case for them because when I tried to them how I felt it was changed and reversed to how they felt which in return drove me more crazy then I was in the beginning.
I will say though this line “Don’t you know you drive me crazy” does a great job of explaining the idea of how there are certain people or certain things that happen in our life that drive us crazy and make us feel like we are losing our mind and we can’t sleep because of how important this person is to us or how important having this thing is. And so, our mind wanders and we start running different scenarios as to what is going to happen and what would happen if this person knew how much they meant to us. Sango does a great job of sampling this song because he allows the listener to really think about the idea of being driven crazy and how it encompasses your whole entire life. On the other side of this idea it can also be seen as a bad thing in terms of why you are being driven crazy. One can look at this idea of someone driving you crazy because they hurt you and you can’t think about anything else because they are all you are thinking about. And the only way to get rid of this feeling is to fully accept what happen and realize that you truly will never forget how this person drove you crazy because in a way they are part of you forever. That’s a sobering fact to realize but it’s the truth and sometimes the truth is the only way to fully have closure.
Originally published at www.thewanderingear.com.
